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雅思作文高分例文之城市发展类详解 Ken老师点评:雅思作文学生习作(1)

更新:2023年05月02日 22:39 雅思无忧

雅思考试主要是通过对考生听、说、读、写四个方面英语能力的考核,综合测评考生的英语沟通运用能力,实现“沟通为本”的考试理念。对于雅思考生来说,也有很多考试难点和政策盲区需要帮助解答。今天雅思无忧网小编准备了雅思作文高分例文之城市发展类详解 Ken老师点评:雅思作文学生习作(1),希望通过文章来解决雅思考生这方面的疑难问题,敬请关注。
雅思作文高分例文之城市发展类详解 Ken老师点评:雅思作文学生习作(1)

雅思作文高分例文之城市发展类详解


有几百年历史的城镇,似乎距离我们很遥远,但是仔细一想你脚下的这片热土早已饱经风霜,只是你没有意识到而已。本次考题的难度较为有限,首先城市发展与规划方面的话题算是较为常见。同时本题的提问方式是非常简单的双提问的报告方式。因此对于有一定备考经历的考生而言,此题应该不会给大家造成什么障碍。

例题如下:重庆环球雅思

There are many towns and cities designed and

constructed in previous centuries, and they are suitable for those times. What

problems are caused by this today? And how to solve these problems?

Visiting ancient towns and cities is seemingly thought as an significant part of people’s

traveling plans, whereas talking about settling down there people surely will

begin to doubt whether living there is possible and whether comfortable or not.

开头段还是一如既往地介绍背景和点题,由于本题的提问方式和以往的辩论型问题不同, 因此本段的点题也略有变化.

这类报告文章,通常情况下在开头段不会清晰阐述笔者的立场。

Eventually, residents in old towns and cities built and planned

long time ago are confronted with quite a number of problems. To begin with, narrow streets

there were designed before modern transports’ popularity, leading to the fact

that an efficient public transport system cannot be applied. In addition, pipelines for

natural gas and heating system, two considerably important social services for

modern lifestyle, cannot be in harmony with constructions built hundreds of

years ago. Metropolis in history are usually horizontal ones without any

high-rise buildings, and thus relatively *aller population is able to be

accommodated there, which is absolutely against urbanization regarded as main

task for most of governments worldwide.

本段内容只针对问题一。用排比的形式提出了现如今居住在古城里面的居民正在面临什么问题。本段罗列了三个主要问题,在真实考试中为了篇幅的控制通常两个问题即可满足篇幅要求.

It seems easy that governments can utilize modern technology to modify old towns and

cities for providing local people with much more comfortable living conditions.

Rebuilding like this, nevertheless, definitely ruins what our ancestors left us.

Instead, governments should make every effort to preserve old towns and cities,

and strictly control the population of who are willing to accept ancient

lifestyle and settle down there. Adjacent to old towns and cities, modern cities

should be planned by governments where residents can share more social resource

and enjoy more convenience brought by usage of high-tech in our daily life. Only

by this way, can those cultural heritages be protected perfectly.

自然而然地,

本段重点回答题干的第二个问题,既解决方案。只不过在观点方面, 笔者坚持了新城市的建设才是解决问题的关键。而任何对于古城的改造都是破坏。

Reforming old towns and cities with a couple of hundred years' history is completely an

unwise decision. Meanwhile, as for who like to enjoy a modern, comfortable and

convenient lifestyle, moving out of old places seems like the only solution.

Ken老师点评:雅思作文学生习作(1)

题目:Some people believe the fittest and strongest individual and team achieve the great success in the sports. Others believe success depends on their mental attitudes. Discuss on both sides. What is your opinion?

Sports, no matter what their scales are, are the combination of intelligent and psychological factors and physical power of team members. To pursue success in sports, these factors are all indispensable and interactive.
(Comments: 1.(Don’t repeat your mistakes!))

Some people may argue that the only determinant for winning a sport is the physical strength of the team members. Namely, the stronger the individuals are, the higher possibilities the team will succeed in a competition event. We have to admit that the majority of sports require team members to have fit and powerful bodies. However, we should also notice that competition with other teams is not fighting with them. It is hard to image that a group of strongest apes win a game against a team of higher intelligent creatures.

( Comments: 2.(Pay close heed to the fact that you should use the noun form to function as the subject !) (Object clause is a good choice, and the non-predicate structure is also acceptable, yet never confuse them!))

Intelligent and psychological factors, therefore, play another part of important role in sports. Provided that a team is equipped with the strongest team members, it is still less likely for them to succeed in one game if its members are pessimistic and lack of strategies in competing with other teams. One famous case which can illustrate the importance of mental attitude and intelligent factors is that the Chinese football team’s successful entrance in the World Cup. The motto of that team’s coach is that attitude determinates everything. With the guidance of their coach, Chinese football players finally won the entrance competition with the support of positive attitude and appropriate strategies.

(Comments: 3. (Excellent! Very good application of exemplification!)

(The original slogan of the Chinese football team is “Attitude is everything!”) What you used here may seem a little Chinglish.)

Intelligent and mental power and the physical strength of team members are mutually influencing one another. The advantage of physical condition may probably add confidence to team members and inspire their best psychological state. On the other hand, the optimistic and positive attitudes are most likely to stimulate the best potential of individuals and bring them encouragement and ultimately lead to success. It can therefore be arguably concluded that mental attitude and physical condition are both significant in pursuing a team’s victory.

Very excellent as a whole!

Just keep up the good work and do the same in IELTS exam!

Pay close attention to details!

Grades: 7

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